Dear Blank, Please Blank – Fairy Tale Edition

Check out the fantastic entry I found on “Dear Blank, Please Blank.”

“Dear parents,

Jasmine was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named Aladdin. Snow White lived alone with 7 men. Pinnochio was a liar. Robin Hood was a thief. Tarzan walked around without clothes on. A stranger kissed sleeping beauty and she married him. Cinderella lied and snuck out at night to attend a party.

Sincerely, it’s not our fault, it’s how you raised us”

Although this post does a lot to boil context off of these stories, I have to admit its hilarity.  Interestingly, although many fairy tales are morality tales and discourage bad behavior, this post points out all the things the characters are actually getting away with.  Not only that, but most of the characters actually made worse choices than we tell modern children.  For instance, Sleeping Beauty didn’t just marry a stranger who kissed her; she married a stranger who raped her.

In Disney's "Sleeping Beauty," the princess was awakened with a kiss. In some earlier versions, however, the prince raped her in her sleep and she did not awaken until she gave birth.

For those of you unfamiliar with “Dear Blank, Please Blank,” it’s a funny site where people can essentially make jokes only in that form.  It’s reasonably self-explanatory, but people pick the to, the from, and a humorous message to go in between.  If you’d like to see the post in its original form, click here.

Disney Comparison: Twisted Princesses

Many fairy tales started out as grisly stories containing deaths and violence.  The versions most people are familiar with today, however, are the heavily edited Disney-fied ones that can be seen in a plethora of animated film, in which the villain meets a just (albeit often nonviolent) end, the prince and princess get married and, perhaps most importantly, all the main characters survive.

Although it’s the nature of fairy tales, as a genre that was long sustained by word of mouth, to evolve over time, the comparison between the Disney versions and the originals is fascinating.  Maybe that’s why I always love to see someone give the universally recognizable Disney girls a makeover.  This series by artist Jeffrey Thomas is one of the best examples of that I’ve seen.

Snow White is my favorite, but they’re all fantastically grim.  Ariel comes in at a close second, and Jasmine and Rapunzel are vying for third.  Not only does the artist create these gorgeously dark fairy tale images, but he makes creepy story profiles for each princess.  What’s not to love?


Snow White is my favorite of Jeffrey Thomas' twisted princesses.


To see the rest of this amazing series, check out Jeffrey Thomas’ gallery on Deviant Art.

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